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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Q: What is a kiss? A: Very simple, its an inquiry at the top floor about the vacancy in the ground floor. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Judge: why you want divorce? Man: she does not satisfy me in bed. Judge: its true madam? Lady: d**n it, whole colony is happy, only this idiot has problem. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two men searching for their lost wife's. 1st: how does your wife looks? 2nd: 5.9 height, 36-24-36, fair, blue eyes, s**y, what is yours? 1st: forget mine, let's search yours. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lady Teacher: write a sentence ending with hand. Banta: My p***s in your hand. Teacher slapped Banta. Santa: Sorry mam, I forget to put space between PEN IS. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When a lady s Pregnant, all her Friends touch her Stomach n say "CONGRATS" But, none of them comes & touch men's P***s and say "Well done". Hard work never appreciated. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While f*****g girl started shouting PEPSI PEPSI boy asked : what's PEPSI? She replied : P-please E-enter P-p***s S-slowly I-inside. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ FIFA has decided that girls should be goalkeepers for the world cup, because no matter how wide they open, they never lets the balls go in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 4 stages of love. 1. Hand in hand. 2. Hand in that. 3. That in hand. 4. That in that. Now don't ask me what is that. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Men raping a woman. The woman laughing nonstop so after sometime the men get angry and ask her, why you laughing,
she replied : I have AIDS. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wife bought a new transparent bra and wore in front of her husband. Husband: honey you look very s**y in this bra. Wife: you know salesman was also saying same thing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Girl enters a s**x shop. Girl: where is the duplicate p***s section? Clerk: it's their mam. Girl: how much for this big red one? Clerk: sorry madam, its fire extinguisher. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A boy comes to class with broken glasses. Teacher: what happened? Boy: I was kissing my girlfriend. Teacher: but how did your glasses broke? Boy: she closed her legs. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A naked lady gets into taxi. Driver looks at her. Lady: haven't you ever seen a naked woman? Driver: no I am just wondering where you have kept the money to pay me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In a lift, man's elbow accidentally touched lady's breast. Man: if your heart is soft as your breast you will forgive me. Lady: if you s**x o***n is hard as your elbow I am in room 207. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A note in the s**x magazines shop: please hold the magazines with both hands while reading. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ One man married lady traffic police. Friend asks how was your 1st night. Man Replied : She collected $100 from me for over speeding, $200 for wrong side entry, $500 for no safety helmet. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A British man sees front side of girl t-shirt : handle with care. Next day the British man wears jeans pant and writes candle with hair. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What's common between sun and a women's underwear? Both are hot, both look good while going down, both disappear by night. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Customer: my wife needs a bra but I don't know her bra size. Salesgirl: touch my breast and try to calculate. Customer: oh I forget she needs panties too. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~