Post your jokes here

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_shahahah_

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Joined: 22 Feb 08
From: Singapore
Posts: 9012

Post #5914 April 2008, 06:20

Quote of user: thump_rockstar


Hostages In A Bank Robbery !


A guy robs a bank and takes hostages.

He asks one of the hostage, "Did you see me rob the bank?"

The hostage answers, "Yes."

The crook, promptly shoots him.

Then he asks the another hostage the same question, "Did you see me rob the bank?"

The hostage answers, "No, but my wife over there did."

gd one

Quitter

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Post #5924 April 2008, 06:47
Thanks Friend @ sk8ter28182

One Monday morning a mailman is walking the neighborhood on his usual route. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars were in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by Bob, the homeowner, coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles. "Wow Bob, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night." the mailman comments.

Bob in obvious pain replies, "Actually we had it Saturday night. This is the first I have felt like moving since 4:00 am Sunday morning. We had about fifteen couples from around the neighborhood over for Christmas Cheer and it got a bit wild. Hell, we got so d***k around midnight that we started playing WHO AM I."

The mailman thinks a moment and says, "How do you play that?"

Well all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us and only our "privates" showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is."

The mailman laughs and says, "D**n, I'm sorry I missed that."

Probably a good thing you did," Bob responds. "Your name came up four or five times."



sk8ter28182

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Joined: 15 Aug 06
From: India
Posts: 2841

Post #5934 April 2008, 07:04

Quote of user: thump_rockstar

A Smart Child-A Must Read!


A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third -grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"

The teacher had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.

While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told the teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave. The teacher agreed.

Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"

Harry: "9".

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"

Harry: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know. The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the third-grade."

The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?"

The principal and Harry both agree.

The teacher asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"

Harry, after a moment, "Legs."

Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!

Harry replied, "Pockets."

Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"

Harry: "Pants"

Teacher: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Harry: Coconut

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry was taking charge.

Teacher: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

Harry: Bubblegum

Teacher: What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog do on three legs?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer.

Harry: Shake hands

Teacher: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?

Harry: Yep.

Teacher: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.

Harry: Tent

Teacher: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

Principal was looking restless and bit tense.

Harry: Wedding Ring

Teacher: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.

Harry: Nose

Teacher: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.

Harry: Arrow

Teacher: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of excitement?

Harry: Firetruck

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I missed the last ten questions myself."


hahahahhahaa....this is amazin man...the teacher jus missed the last ten questions.....i missed all the questions....hahahahaa very funny....hahaha

sk8ter28182

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Joined: 15 Aug 06
From: India
Posts: 2841

Post #5944 April 2008, 07:06

Quote of user: thump_rockstar

Thanks @ Missrico.

Hostages In A Bank Robbery !


A guy robs a bank and takes hostages.

He asks one of the hostage, "Did you see me rob the bank?"

The hostage answers, "Yes."

The crook, promptly shoots him.

Then he asks the another hostage the same question, "Did you see me rob the bank?"

The hostage answers, "No, but my wife over there did."



hhahahahahahaha...

jmoore06

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Joined: 15 Mar 08
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 1

Post #5954 April 2008, 07:09
Ok ok here goes. Whats worse than your shoelace coming undone?... The holocaust!:-):-)

This post was written on a mobile device.

thump_rockstar

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Joined: 10 Sep 07
From: India
Posts: 1291

Post #5964 April 2008, 07:31
Thanx @ Shah n Sk8ter!

An Ideal 21st Century Concept Keyboard For Men!!


_shahahah_

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Joined: 22 Feb 08
From: Singapore
Posts: 9012

Post #5974 April 2008, 07:33

Quote of user: thump_rockstar

Thanx @ Shah n Sk8ter!

An Ideal 21st Century Concept Keyboard For Men!!



where can i get that???????
wait theres no zedge....

thump_rockstar

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Joined: 10 Sep 07
From: India
Posts: 1291

Post #5984 April 2008, 07:36
[quote="S*****h"]

Quote of user: thump_rockstar

Thanx @ Shah n Sk8ter!

An Ideal 21st Century Concept Keyboard For Men!!



where can i get that???????
wait theres no zedge....
[/quote]


The Designers will take ur suggestion into considerstion!

Steva723

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Joined: 30 Jan 08
From: Serbia
Posts: 8

Post #5995 April 2008, 13:22
A boy is standing on the bridge and cryig...
A policeman asked him:Why are you crying?
Boy:My pizza fell in the water...
Policeman:With wath?With ketchup or with cheese?
Boy:With my brother!

Steva723

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Joined: 30 Jan 08
From: Serbia
Posts: 8

Post #6005 April 2008, 13:23
What is the difference beatvin a chicken?
The chicken has two legs,and specialy the left one!

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