Post your jokes here

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Jaykeyz

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Joined: 8 Mar 12
From: Nigeria
Posts: 14

Post #21318 March 2012, 13:42
A guy was toasting a girl and he goes like this
"I can't eat in the morning cos I fink of u"
"I can't eat in the afternoon cos I fink of u"
I can't eat in the evening cos I fink of u"
"I can't sleep @ nyt cos I'm hungry"...lol

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groovygirl2

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Joined: 7 Mar 12
From: Afghanistan
Posts: 2

Post #21329 March 2012, 22:31
one kid was white and another kid was black. The white kid said your are black and the black kid said your white so wat is the diffrence smiling eyes

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chlorine2

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Joined: 9 Feb 12
From: Pakistan
Posts: 1

Post #213311 March 2012, 21:00
A dentist ran out of anaesthetic just before the last extraction for the day was scheduled.
He gave the nurse a very large needle, instructing her to jab it hard into the patient's butt when the signal was given, so it would take hisattention away from the tooth extraction.
It all happened in an instant.
The nurse, patient, and pliers were inplace. The signal was given, and the nurse bayoneted the patient with the needle just as the dentist yanked the tooth.
Afterwards, the dentist asked, "Hurt much?"
The patient hesitated, "Didn't hardly feel it come out. And, man, those roots were really deep!

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Mushinge

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Joined: 28 Feb 12
From: Zambia
Posts: 1

Post #213413 March 2012, 19:52
Two cannibals were at a circus eating a clown, one turned to the other and said, does this taste funny to you?"

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_Maahi__

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Joined: 16 Aug 11
From: Pakistan
Posts: 3063

Post #213513 March 2012, 20:40
Every Time I Open The Laptop To Do The
Assignments...
My Fingers Automatically Start Typing
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www.zedge.com

_Prototype

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Joined: 15 Feb 11
From: United States
Posts: 699

Post #213613 March 2012, 20:47
I never take risk while drinking
When I come from office in the evening, wife is cooking
I can hear the noise of utensils in the kitchen
I stealthily enter the house
Take out the bottle from my black cupboard
Shivaji Maharaj is looking at me from the photo frame
But still no one is aware of it
Becoz I never take a risk
I take out the glass from the rack above the old sink
Quickly enjoy one peg
Wash the glass and again keep it on the rack
Of course I also keep the bottle inside my cupboard
Shivaji Maharaj is giving a smile
I peep into the kitchen
Wife is cutting potatoes
No one is aware of what I did
Becoz I never take a risk
I: Any news on chopra's daughter's marriage
Wife: Nope, she doesn't seem to be that lucky. Still they are looking
out for her
I again come out; there is a small noise of the black cupboard
But I don't make any sound while taking out the bottle
I take out the glass from the old rack above sink
Quickly enjoy one peg
Wash the bottle and keep it in the sink
Also keep the Black Glass in the cupboard
But still no one is aware of what I did
Becoz I never take a risk
I: But still I think chopra's daughter's age is not that much
Wife: What are you saying? She is 28 yrs old... like an aged horse
I: (I forgot her age is 28) Oh Oh...
I again take out potatoes out from my black cupboard
But the cupboard's place has automatically changed
I take out the bottle from the rack and quickly enjoy one peg in the sink
Shivaji Maharaj laughs loudly
I keep the rack in the potatoes & wash Shivaji Maharaj's photo & keep it in
the black cupboard
Wife is keeping the sink on the stove
But still no one is aware of what I did
Becoz I never take a risk
I: (getting angry) you call Mr. chopra a horse? If you say that again, I
will cut your tongue...!
Wife: Don't just blabber something, go out and sit quietly...
I take out the bottle from the potatoes
Go in the black cupboard and enjoy a peg
Wash the sink and keep it over the rack
Wife is giving a smile
Shivaji Maharaj is still cooking
But still no one is aware of what I did
Becoz I never take a risk
I: (laughing) So chopra is marrying a horse!!
Wife: Hey go and sprinkle some water on your face...
I again go to the kitchen, and quietly sit on the rack
Stove is also on the rack
There is a small noise of bottles from the room outside
I peep and see that wife is enjoying a peg in the sink
But none of the horses are aware of what I did
Becoz Shivaji Maharaj never takes a risk
chopra is still cooking
And I am looking at my wife from the photo and laughing
Becoz I never take what??

_Dreamy_Gal_

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Joined: 2 Jul 11
From: Turkey
Posts: 14575

Post #213713 March 2012, 20:54
Two Sardar : stopped suddenly.

1st Sardar: OMG! My wife and my girlfriend coming together.

2nd Sardar: Mine too

amelietm

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Joined: 12 Mar 12
From: Romania
Posts: 8

Post #213814 March 2012, 13:30
Once upon a time, a woman had a faithful cat. And one day, a guy ran over the cat with his horse drawn carriage. So, the man went to the old woman and said..


"I'm terribly sorry about your cat. I'd like to replace him."


"That so nice of you!" said the old woman, deeply touched.


"So how good are you at catching mice?"

Quitter

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Post #213915 March 2012, 08:57
Job Interview

A guy goes to Gov IT to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"
He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee."
"OK, have you ever been in the military?
"Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for one tour."
The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment."
Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy says, "Yes.. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles."
The interviewer grimaces and then says, "Okay.. You've got enough points for me
to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm.
You can start tomorrow at 10:00 am, and plan on starting at 10:00 am every day."
The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm, why don't you want me here until 10:00 am?"
"This is a government job," the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."

Quitter

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Post #214015 March 2012, 08:59
boys really love girls

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