Post your jokes here

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pitt21

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Joined: 12 Dec 06
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 114

Post #1012 March 2007, 13:00
a man walks into the doctors -'' doctor i feel like a moth !'' he says
the doctor looks bemused- " what are you doing here then you should be at a psychiatrists ?!?"
"i know", the man says, "but i was just passing and your light was on !"

nofreaks

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Joined: 2 Feb 07
From: Sri Lanka
Posts: 473

Post #1022 March 2007, 13:00
5. when an apple is green, its ready to pluck
when a girl is sixteen, she is ready to f**k

ronnieig

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Joined: 2 Mar 07
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 16

Post #1033 March 2007, 23:57
two ariels got married on a roof. the ceremony was s***e but the reception was briliant.

ronnieig

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Joined: 2 Mar 07
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 16

Post #1043 March 2007, 23:59
man goes to clinic with strawberries stuck to his head. doctor gives him some cream to put on it.

ronnieig

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Joined: 2 Mar 07
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 16

Post #1054 March 2007, 00:01
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.
>>>> My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him? "
>>>>"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up
>>>>and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I'm
>>>>going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed? " "No,
>>>>because he's really heavy"

ronnieig

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Joined: 2 Mar 07
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 16

Post #1064 March 2007, 00:02
Doctor, I can't pronounce my F's, T's and H's."
>>>> "Well you can't say fairer than that then"

ronnieig

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Joined: 2 Mar 07
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 16

Post #1074 March 2007, 00:03
So I went to the dentist.
>>>> He said "Say Aaah."
>>>> I said "Why?"
>>>> He said "My dog's died.'"

ronnieig

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Joined: 2 Mar 07
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 16

Post #1084 March 2007, 00:05
So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and
>>>>said 'Who's speaking please?' And a voice said 'You are.'"
>>>>

ronnieig

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Joined: 2 Mar 07
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 16

Post #1094 March 2007, 00:06
So I rang up my local swimming baths.
>>>> I said 'Is that the local swimming baths?'
>>>> He said 'It depends where you're calling from.'"
>>>>

ronnieig

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Joined: 2 Mar 07
From: United Kingdom
Posts: 16

Post #1104 March 2007, 00:07
So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang
>>>>up, and he said 'You've been promoted.' And I swerved. And then he rang
>>>>up a second time and said You've been promoted again.' And I swerved
>>>>again. He rang up a third time and said You're managing director.' And I
>>>>went into a tree.
>>>> And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I
>>>>said 'I careered off the road.

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