man was driving down a local street one day and approached a stop sign. He barely slowed down and ran right through the stop sign after glancing for traffic. What the driver didn't know was that a policeman was watching the intersection. The policeman pulled out after him and stopped the car two blocks away.

Policeman: "License, registration and proof of insurance please."

Driver: "Before I give it to you, tell me what the heck you stopped me for, man."

Policeman: "Watch your tone sir; you ran that stop sign back there!"

Driver: "Man, I slowed down, what the heck is the difference?"

The police officer pulled out his night-stick and began whacking the man over
the head and shoulders. Bang! Bang! Whomp! Bang!

Policeman: "Now, do you want me to just slow down, or stop!!!?

Koun Banega Crore Pati...? (HINDI)


Amitabh : apka 13th question 25 lakh yeh raha apke samne..

Contestant: is tensed.

Amitabh : Who is the father of Abhishek Bachan

Computer Screen:

A. Amitabh Bachan B. Laloo Prasad Yadav
C. vinod khana D. MANMOHAN SINGH.

Amitabh : Apka kya jawab hai ? ( He is quite sure
that Contestant will opt for A) But still confused.

Amitabh : Apke pas do life line hai..(50:50 and phone a friend)

Contestant: I think it is A but am not sure.

Amitabh : Not sure... Hmmm Ap kya karna chahenge?

Contestant : I would like to use 50:50?

Amitabh: Ok computer , 2 galat javabo ko mita de..

Computer :
B. Laloo Prasad Yadav.
C. vinod khana

Amitabh is confused and tensed thinks how come the computer
has made this mistake But as is said in bollywood the show must
go on. Now Contestant is confused. Contestant: i would like to use the last life
line phone a friend..

Amitabh : Ap kisko phone karna chahenge?

CONTESTANT : Mein Jaya Bachan ji ko phone karna chahoonga...? ? ? ?

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.

"Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner."

She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder.

"Don't move until I tell you," she said. "Pretend you're a statue."

"What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.

"Oh it's a statue." she replied. "The Smiths bought one and I liked it so
much I got one for us, too."

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.

Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a
sandwich and a beer.

"Here," he said to the statue, "have this. I stood like that for two days
at the Smith's and nobody offered me a damned thing."