K Lets share our smses here...
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85 Yr old V****n dying lady wanted her grave to read, "Born V****n Lived V****n Died V****n" The sculpter shortened it to, "PARCEL returned UNOPENED."

women's life is very hard.
in da morning wash clothes
in da noon dry clothes
in da evening iron clothes
at night remove clothes
ar midnight search for clothes

kishan its funny man.........

Newton discovered gravity seeing applefalling from tree at the age of 23.
i wonder why he didnt get this idea while s******g for 23 years.

mom: you know my son, im kinda noticing you're good in math so im gonna try and ask you a math question ok?

son: ok mom

mom: if ur daddy gives you 3 apples and i give you 4 apples, wat is ur answer?

son: THANK YOU MOM AND DAD!!!!!

Little Johnny's neighbour had a baby. But he was born without ears. Johnny and his mum and dad went to visit the baby and Johnny was warned not to mention its ears or he would get a spanking. Johnny looked in the cot and said what a lovely baby. Lovely feet, hands and skin. How's his eyesight. The baby's mother said it was perfect. Johnny replied "thats great cos he'd be f****d if he needs glasses !!"

nice one imawitch

Husband says to wife "My olympic condoms have arrived, I think i'll wear Gold tonight" Wife says "Why don't you wear Silver and cum 2nd for a change

Why is a woman like a hurricane?

Cos when she comes shes all wet and wild, and when she leaves she takes your house and car..

Hope these are ok, just a few I've saved up, have more but don't think I can post them here lol


Load of blokes at a bucking bronco contest-1 bloke manages to stay on for 10mins. His mate says"how did you manage that"-he says ah, my wifes epileptic